I'd go crazy without you
by iiNeaPoliTan
Summary: Makoto loves spending time with Haru; Rin must make Makoto understand a few things. MakoHaru; RinMako friendship


This is my first contribution to the MakoHaru fanfiction. I am so in love with this ship, I can't even put it into words. It's just, the friendship, admiration and devotion with these two is too much for me and I end up grossly sobbing in fetal position atop my bed.

I'm not sure if something like this has been done in this fandom, and if it has, I'm sorry. I disown the characters. BTW, there is a reference to High Speed! You don't need to have read it to understand the story; it'd just be make more sense if you have.

The first rays of the morning peeked their way through the white shutters of his window just opposite his bed. His face scrunched in annoyance as his body began to stir; why couldn't he sleep for just a bit longer? It was a Saturday after all.

He stifled a yawn as he tried to get up, but his movements where constricted as he felt a tight hold around his chest. He slowly opened his eyes and his gaze traveled down his bare torso to the pale arm wrapped around him.

A smile adorned his lips as his gaze traveled up the length of the arm and came to rest to the boy sleeping next to him, to his best friend, to his Haru-chan. He really had to use the rest room now that he was fully awake, but in order to admire the peaceful, serene face Haru displayed during his slumber, Makoto would wait.

He didn't have to wait long. The sun's rays that had woke him up not ten minutes ago where starting to have the same effect on Haru. The smaller male turned to hide his face into the pillow, trying to rid himself of the menacing light, but it was no use. The sun had woke him up.

Makoto couldn't help but give a soft chuckle as the other gave a muffled groan in annoyance.

"Ohayou, Haru-chan." Makoto greeted his friend as the other peeked one eye from the pillow.

"Stop putting -chan to my name already." This was his usual way of greeting his friend, something Makoto was well aware of after years of friendship. It didn't bother him; it never did; so instead, he just smiled at a grumpy Haru as said boy shoved his face under the pillow instead.

Makoto took this opportunity to get up and walked towards the rest room.

As he reached to door, Haru spoke to him, "What day is it?"

Makoto, hand on the knob, slowly let it fall as he bit his lower lip anxiously.

"It's Saturday," he answered reluctantly.

"Tch. So _he's_ coming over today, huh?" There was a bitter tone in Haru's voice; not that anyone else would have caught it. To anyone else, Haru sounded like his usual uninterested self, but Makoto knew better. _He_ was a touchy subject to Haru.

"Yes." Makoto responded. He didn't understand why Haru was so upset. _He_ would always stop by every Saturday morning and visit Makoto. Of course, when _he_ did, Haru always thought it best to leave. He didn't like _him_ so well, something Makoto didn't understand why.

"Why? Didn't he come last weekend?"

"Well, you know _he's_ come to visit me every weekend ever since _he_ returned from Australia last month. _He'd_ visit you too, but _he_ knows you don't like him, so _he_ doesn't bother." Makoto tried to reason.

It was true. Ever since Rin entered their lives about five years ago, Haru had never wanted to get involved with him. Makoto could read Haru like a book, but when it came to Rin, Makoto could never tell. He couldn't find a reason as to why Haru would distrust Rin so much if it was thanks to Rin's help that Makoto was able to pull Haru out of the river that day… that horrible day when Makoto almost lost Haru.

Haru didn't answer. He just hid his face under the pillow once more. The conversation was over.

With a deep sigh, Makoto walked out of the room.

When he came back, Haru was sitting on the already made bed. He had a small plate of mackerel with him; his mom had forgotten Haru was spending the night and he didn't want to bother her into making another meal, so he prepared Haru's favorite dish himself.

"Haru? I brought you your favorite." Haru remained unmoved. "It's mackerel," he offered one last time; a smile spread across his face as Haru finally moved.

"Thanks. Makoto."

Makoto watched Haru eat. The morning hours passed fast as the two engaged in conversation of any thing and every thing; from swimming, to sharks; from penguins, to butterflies. These were Makoto's favorite times. When he and Haru were together and the world around them disappeared.

As it neared noon, Makoto started noticing Haru's small displays of unease. He'd be drumming his fingers, his eyes wandering around.

"Haru, what is it?"

"I think I'll go home."

"Eh? But why?"

"I don't want to meet up with Rin. And Makoto, I don't think you should either," Haru spoke seriously.

"Ah. Haru, I can't do that. It'd be rude. Rin always comes-" and Makoto was interrupted by the ringing of the bell; Rin had arrived.

"I'll leave out the back door." Haru stood up.

Makoto's eyes shot open. "Haru, you're over reacting. Rin is a great guy and he loves swimming just as much as you do. Just give him a chance."

Haru's sapphire eyes stared into Makoto's emerald ones. Looking away, Haru finally spoke, "Alright, but I need to use the bathroom."

"Okay." Makoto smiled at him.

Haru left the room and as soon as the door clicked shut behind him, it opened again; this time, Rin came inside.

"Yo." He said as he walked inside.

"Ohayo, Rin." Makoto smiled. "Oh, did you run into Haru? The door had just closed behind him when you walked in."

Rin bit his lower lip as he looked at Makoto with saddened eyes. Makoto looked at him dumbfounded. It seemed like Rin wanted to… cry.

"Rin? What's the matter? Did you see Haru?"

The next few instances where a blur. One moment, Rin was by the door, the next, he had his arms wrapped around Makoto. His body shook slightly as he squeezed Makoto into a tight embrace.

"Rin, what is it?"

Makoto felt a warmness soak through his shirt. Rin was crying.

"Rin?"

"Makoto, please…"

"What?"

"Haru… Haru's dead, Makoto. He's been dead for five years." Rin shook violently as he said this, his words chocking in his throat.

Makoto was in paralyzed for a few moments, before he broke into a soft chuckle.

"That is a horrible prank, Rin. I know it's not true. Haru spent the night; he just went to rest room just now."

Rin pulled away from Makoto and looked him in the eye, tears still falling. "Makoto, please. Please. Please," he begged. "That day, we pulled him out of the water, but on the way to the hospital, Haru gave up." Rin insisted. "He died Makoto!"

Makoto shook his head violently. "No. No. No!" Images of two small boys pulling out a wet Haru from the river; flashing lights, red, blue; cold air, such cold air; cries, screams, his cries, his screams; Haru, Haru, Haru, Haru! "Stop it!"

He pushed Rin away with all his strength. His hands rushing to cover his ears; he needed to silence the screaming. Haru wasn't dead! Haru had spent the night! Haru had been with him all this time! Haru wasn't dead!

He ran towards the door. Haru was in the restroom, just like he said he would be.

"Makoto!" Rin ran after him.

The door to the burst open to an empty restroom. No Haru. No traces of Haru ever being there.

"Makoto."

"Rin, please leave. Haru doesn't like you very much. That's why he's hiding."

Rin placed his hand on Makoto's shoulder. "Makoto, please."

Makoto looked up at Rin with a smile. "It's okay, Rin. Once you leave, Haru will come back, and I'll be okay."

Rin left his friend behind. It was always like this. Every weekend, he'd come to spend time with Makoto, but the same thing would always happen. Makoto would bring up Haru, Rin would try and make him accept that Haru died that day by the river, Makoto would not accept it and ask Rin to leave so that Haru could come back, and a week later, Rin would show up again, and the cycle continued.

Rin remembered that day. Makoto cried and screamed Haruka's name till his throat was sore and his eyes were dry. He had never seen someone shake so much before…

"Makoto, is he gone?" Haru placed a gentle hand on Makoto's shoulder, the same place Rin had done moments before.

"Yes." Makoto placed a hand over Haru's. "I'm sorry Haru. I know why you don't like Rin." Makoto chuckled. "He played a mean joke on me, saying you were dead."

Haru tightened his grip on Makoto's shoulder.

"What if I am, Makoto?"

At this, Makoto's eyes shot open and he turned to look at Haru, his head shaking. "No. i… it's not true, Haru. You're right here, see?" he said as he touched his friends face. "I don't know what I'd do without you, Haru." He said as he wrapped his arms around Haru's waist.

"Is that's so?"

Makoto nodded.

"I'd go crazy if you weren't with me, Haru."

I'm not really happy with my results. I'll just leave it here and fix it up during the Christmas break. Yeah. I'll do that. After I complete my unfinished works… yeah..


End file.
